Are You There God? It's Me, Lita.

a few days after the holiday fuckery, I was in my parents' kitchen when i spied with my right eye, a box of candies. not just any candy - my fave Mexican candy. so i stood in front of the table, looking at all of the dulce yumminess and remembering my promise to myself to be healthy.

my eyes raised up to the ceiling and i had a conversation with the man upstairs.

"Are you there, God? Buddha? 7 pounds, 10 oz Baby Jesus? it's me again, you know, Lita. now i know all about to thyne own self be true but seriously, help me. do you want me to be a funky chunky monkey? or do you want me to be a miserable skinny minnie? do i eat these dulces chocolate or not?"

i was going to give the man in charge exactly 30 seconds to show me a sign and then i was going full out crazy and eating them all. after about 10 seconds, i hear a voice.

it said "Eat the chocolate."

i screamed like a girl and almost fell over.

turns out, my dad heard me from the den and decided to answer me.

i ate the chocolate.


http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Are_You_There_God%3F_It's_Me,_Margaret.

Are you there God? It's Me, Margaret
Blume, Judy
1970